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Rewarding Your Bride

by John Max

When it comes to remembering special occasions, I'm a lazy guy. I absolutely hate keeping up with birthdays, anniversaries and whatnot. How badly? So badly that I avoid celebrating them. Seriously. My mother will tell you that I don't care much for Christmas, Thanksgiving etc. So you guys know that I'm not about to care about bullshit like Sweeties Day or whatever the fuck they call it. Here are some rules for rewarding brides:

Under-promise, Over-deliver

I tell brides that they only get their birthday, Christmas, and Valentines Day. If I ever get married, it'll be on Valentines Day, so that eliminates the anniversary problem. I don't celebrate any of the bullshit Hallmark holidays and bullshit anniversaries of the day we first kissed, rubbed genitals, etc.

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If you start celebrating all of those bullshit holidays and anniversaries, she'll come to expect it all of the time. However, what I do like to do, is reward her on some of those special days of MY CHOOSING (and I make it clear that it isn't an every year thing). When I give her a gift out of nowhere, I get a lot of brownie points.


The trick is not to let yourself become overwhelmed by trying to remember all of those dates, but to reward her when you do. Making it clear that you don't celebrate them, gives you room to work with and eliminates obligation.

Surprise her with small gifts

Guys like to go out and buy brides extravagant gifts. I, on the other hand, like to go for the smaller sentimental things. What gets you more points "I bought you another expensive gift"<----(this guy is a tool), or "I bought you this small stuffed animal collection because I remember how you said your parents would never take you to the zoo as a child, so I'm bringing the zoo to you"?

The second one is going to get you so many points. It completely surprises her, shows that you put thought into it, and that you pay attention to what she says to you. In one instance, I was joking around about how I could give a girlfriend 50 reasons why I loved her, and of course she said I couldn't do it. I left it alone, and out of nowhere sometime later, I surprised her with 50+1 reasons why I loved her. She started crying on the spot.

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Compliment her when she least expects it

Self explanatory. She expects you to compliment her on a date or when you're trying to have sex. Too typical. What you want to do, is hit her with compliments out of nowhere. For instance, I might be out eating with a girlfriend, and while she is stuffing her mouth, with ketchup all over her face, I might say "Even when you're pigging out, you're beautiful".

The point is to catch her completely off guard, and not do it so frequently that she becomes insensitive to it.

Most guys over-reward and lack originality. The key is to under-reward, but time it perfectly and use a little originality. Do so, and your girlfriend (wife) will see you as the sweetest guy ever.